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Why a Focus on “Good Vibes Only” Can Actually Be Harmful

There are some “spiritual” schools of thought that seem to lead us to believe we should always be happy, upbeat, joyful, grateful, and only things that are positive.

And that if we feel anything less than that, well we aren’t doing our work or that we are doing something “wrong.”

Yet this constant false positivity is dangerous because it doesn’t allow us to acknowledge where we are at in the present moment and that it is part of being human to sometimes feel less than amazing.

I believe it can even contribute to things like illness when we are constantly suppressing how we feel.

We all experience up and down cycles within our emotional and mental states.

It would be unreasonable to think we should always be positive, upbeat and happy and never experience feelings of sadness, frustration, or depression.

In my own life, I have come to observe this pattern where after weeks of feeling good about life, in the flow, and happy, then I hit a low patch.

In the low, everything feels heavier, more challenging, more emotionally overwhelming. Feelings of sadness, grief, or frustration can come to the surface. The low definitely doesn’t feel so good.

In fact, right now, I am in a little bit of a low.

Yet when I start getting into thinking that I should resist the low, force myself out of it, or when I judge or blame myself for experiencing the low, that is when things get worse.

It is natural to experience this ebb and flow cycle in life and the more we push against the low, get frustrated by it, or judge or blame ourselves for feeling it, the harder it becomes to move through it.

Resisting the low or thinking negative thoughts about ourselves because of the low doesn’t honor that it is a part of our natural cycles of life AND it also makes certain feelings and emotions seem WRONG.

If you are sad and down, allow yourself to feel those feelings.

If you are frustrated and feel stuck, again allow yourself to feel those feelings too.

ALL EMOTIONS ARE JUST ENERGY.

When we give ourselves space to simply be present with what we are experiencing and we get curious about if there is a deeper meaning or message to how we are feeling that we need to examine, things can begin to move and shift in a very natural way.

When we fight the feelings or we suppress them, the energy of them often grows stronger and it becomes harder for it to dissipate.

It is only when we become stuck in the negative and spiral downwards over a longer period of time that it becomes problematic.

If, instead, we feel our feelings, whether we see them as positive or negative, and we let them show us what we need to see, that is where true healing and transformation can occur.

Lyn DelT

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